fair·ness
noun
1. the state, condition, or quality of being fair, or free from bias or injustice; evenhandedness:
2. free from discrimination, dishonesty, etc; just; impartial
Nowhere in that definition does is say that everyone should get the same things that everyone else gets. Nowhere in that definition does is say that others won't get something that you do. It also doesn't say that you won't get less at times. Fairness is hard to understand. More than reading the literal definition and understanding the concept in general, I do not understand the rush to judgement that something (non-life threatening, of course), "Is not fair". Hello ~~~ life is not the same for everyone and we don't all get the same things. Furthermore, why would we want it that way?
Why, as humans, do we not have the gut reaction of support for others over the fear we are missing out or not getting something more or better, even if we don't need more or better? Why can human nature be so darn negative? Is that fair?
It is unfathomable that a 7 year old girl is fighting for her life against a deadly form of Leukemia. It's disgusting that 12 people who went to see the new Batman movie are no longer with us. It's completely unjust that a precious little boy I know had 3 brain surgeries before he was 3 years old. These things are unfair. These things are uncontrollable. Yet many times survivors and loved ones find blessings in the unfairness. They get it. They are given no choice.
Life is full of tragedy and injustice but when it comes to other issues that we have full control over, such as offering schedule flexibility to a new mother, providing a student without means, the means to do something great, or offering help, coaching or support to a struggling teammate, is it considered to be unfair???
Can't our first reaction be that of support, encouragement, love, consideration, teamwork, thankfulness and hope that if and when we need some "fairness", the same might be offered to us? Can't we look at the those situations and trust that the decisions being made are in the best interest of everyone involved? Are we so far gone, that we can longer be kind? And, if we are kind, why on earth is that considered to be unfair?
If fairness meant that everyone got the same treatment, the same pay, the same scope of responsibility, the same type of flexibility or inflexibility, the same, the same, the same....life would be pretty freaking dull, predictable, unimaginative and lack a ton of motivation. People would be droning around the world in the typical probably wearing flats. Yuck!
Fairness isn't about getting the same. It's about being unbias and being free from dishonesty. It's about giving each other what we need to be successful. It's finding creative ways to lift each other. It's about being more. It's selfless. If we think about in those terms before claiming something is unfair, I think most of us (myself definitely included) would come to realize, we have all we need, we sometimes get more than we need, we sometimes lose, but in the end, we are beyond fortunate and we should be happy with what we have.
Please, before you rush to make a claim of unfairness, stop, think and do the following first.
Be kind. Be flexible. Be open. Don't jump quickly to conclusions. Don't be selfish. Be thankful. Be understanding. Have compassion. And, most importantly, be a friend first.
Then tell me if it's unfair.
xo~
Elizabeth
No comments:
Post a Comment