Can you really die of a broken heart?

What a question, right?  Some people would say no, you cannot actually die of a broken heart.  Others would say you absolutely can. Technically people die from broken hearts all the time…probably daily.  Biologically speaking of course you can surely die from a broken heart. Hearts break. They are fragile and not easy to repair.

In this case, I’m not writing about technically dying of a broken heart because we know that is true.  It can and does happen. This is a grander, more thought provoking; can one die of a broken heart question? 

My grandparents recently passed away.  My mom mom died in December 2011 and my pop died about 2 weeks ago. They were married for 62 years.  62 YEARS…I can’t even imagine.  That’s a long a$$ time. Now, don’t misunderstand, everything wasn’t perfect, they argued, and drove each other nuts, at times.  Many times they were not that sweet old couple who most of us picture sitting on a park bench together.  Growing old wasn’t easy on either of them.  It was challenging and they needed help to make it to the end.  But, they stuck it out together and, no matter what, at the end of each day, it was each other who they always wanted to be with.  They had the goo.

He was forever bickering at her for forgetting things and she was forever bickering at him for bickering with her. He could be grumpy and he was the man of the house.  She cooked and cleaned and kept an amazing house.  She fed the birds, had a million house plants and she regularly shampooed the carpets, the curtains and the lawn. Yes you read that correctly, she shampooed the lawn.  She was a great wife.  He loved working outside in the yard, he planted millions of flowers, he decorated like nobody could for Christmas and he enjoyed everything about baseball.  We aren’t quite sure who was more stubborn, him or her. They had one son who they both adored. They threw an annual holiday bash that I hear was super fun in its hay day and they had plastic covers on their couches. She was a strong woman well ahead of her time in many ways.  He was a hard working southern man who liked things a certain way; his way. They were opposites and they genuinely loved each other.

It worked for them that way for 62 years.  She lived her final days in their house and she died surround by his love.  His health had been in steady decline since December and for the last 8 months of his life he lived alone in a house full of memories of her. 

She died of complications from several illnesses of “old age.”  Technically, he died of complications from fluid on his lungs.

I know many readers have had broken hearts.  Sadly, most people have sustained some sort of heart-breaking loss.  Broken hearts where you don’t think you will get through. Broken hearts that cause you to be paralyzed in a world of darkness where you can’t see a future. Broken hearts that bring you tears for years after the loss.  Broken hearts where you lose a piece of yourself that you think you’ll never get back. Broken hearts where a piece of your heart goes with that lost person and is forever gone.  It’s a sad aspect of this thing called life.

On the bright side, most of us do not physically die from these broken hearts.  And, even more important is that most of our hearts begin to heal with time. We are resilient and strong and we press on. While a piece of us may be left behind with our broken heart, most times we can look back and remember the joy before the pain of the loss. We can feel love in our heart and we can be happy again.  Love for the lost person or love for a new person can mend and refill our broken heart and at the same time, never let us forget.  Love is the glue that holds us together when everything else deserts us and love has the beautiful grace to save us.

But there are occasions, where after 62 years of faithful partnership and love, the heart may never quite heal the way it should. Where his partner was an integral part of his connection to this world and he knew he lived a full, happy and complete life.  His body was weak from old age, his health was failing, he could no longer do the things he loved to do and he was tired. I think this was when one loving husband knew it was time to let go and be with his exquisite wife in peace forever.   

So, yes I do believe you can die from a broken heart and in this case, it was in the most beautiful, peaceful, blessed and loving way.

1990 ~ Enjoying my parents wedding

Rest in peace mom mom and pop. Enjoy heaven’s garden together forever. I'm certain the flowers will be immaculate and you both will be smiling. And, we know that all the birdies (and squirrels) will be stuffed full and singing for you daily.

xo ~

Miss Elizabeth

It's Summertime in My Book

Family Vacation Caribbean Style Summer 2011

As anyone who knows me even a very tiny bit knows, I love the summer.  There is nothing I don't like about it.  As far as I'm concerned, Memorial Day weekend is the official start of summer and Labor Day is a day of mourning.  Come Memorial Day your winter clothes are packed away and we can pretend we may never need them again. The pools are open! It's the weekend I look forward to the moment the football season is over.  It's the best!

I've thought about this a lot and know not everyone feels the same. For me, here some of the reasons I love everything about this glorious time of year...

Daylight savings!!!!!!!!!!!!  Staying light until 9:30...yes, please, absolutely, it's amazing...how can we make this happen longer?

Heat and Humidity - Yes that is correct, I said humidity.  That fantastic feeling when you leave your house or a restaurant at 10:30 at night and it's still 85 degrees and humid.  The air is close and heavy and your skin is dewy.  You can walk to get ice cream (another bonus) in the warm night air.

Summer Concerts - A country show at Pier 6 or Merriweather cannot be beat on a warm night.  Pier 6 cheap seats are the best...bring your own snacks and wine and you have a very inexpensive summer concert party. Next country show, come join us for a great time.

VACATIONS to the beach - No summer is complete without at least one week long trip to the beach.  Actually I'd go so far to say that no summer is complete without at least 3 beach vacations...one to somewhere wonderful, like the Caribbean, one to Fenwick Island and one to Dewey Beach.  All fabulous and all a must.  The feeling of warm sand between your toes is a must of every summer. To make the experience even better, stay on the beach until 7:00 pm one day. Don't rush to dinner...stay and enjoy the setting sun...if you've been to the beach with me, you know you have to drag me off.

 Anguilla Summer 2011

Grilling Out - You can grill everything in the summer...burgers, dogs, chicken, steak, veggies, avocado, crabs (maybe not on the grill but steamed in a pot connected to the grill), breads, fish, you name it. Everything tastes better grilled too.

Tan Skin - I know I know, tan skin is a sign of skin damage and causes wrinkles...but frankly I don't care.  Tan skin just looks better. Plus the sun is the best source of Vitamin D. As my Favorite Friend says, feeling the sun on your face is feeling God's kisses. I feel better with a tan, I feel like I look better and I'm OK with that...in moderation of course and not on my face...bronzer only.  Nobody wants to look like tanning mom.



Me and my Fave Friend - Vegas 2010

 Fruits and Veggies - Summer peaches...you know the kind where you bite into them and the juice rolls out and down you hand.  They are sweet and heavenly. Anything locally grown is so good it's almost indescribable...corn, tomatoes, cantaloupe, melons, cucumbers, beans. And a lot of fruit stands offer snowballs...an added bonus.  I'll take mine with marshmallow on top.

Don't let its location on the list fool you into thinking it's anywhere but on the top, Summer Fashion - Sunglasses, sundresses, beach hair, swim suits, shorts, jean skirts, tanks, flip flops, sun kissed highlights, white skirts/pants, fun hats, and wedge sandals, all complimented with sparkle lotion = Fantabulous!

Tiki Bars - The ability to sit outside on the water (or close to the water or using a hut constructed for the sole purpose of giving the illusion of island living) is something only the summer has to offer (unless you live somewhere it's warm all year).  Tiki drinks, like crushes, margaritas and sweet tea anything only serve to compliment this already superb experience.

Tiki Bar at Harpoon Hannah's Summer 2011

Summer Smells & Sights - Honeysuckle, fresh cut grass, food grilling, salty air, fireflies, chlorine, Coppertone suntan lotion, fresh basil, sunsets on the beach, softball games, a thriving garden full of vegetables, a campfire and smores....just to name a few.

Everyday is a reason to have Happy Hour - Enough said. :-)

Free Will Boat Trip Summer 2011 ~ Happy Hour

I rave about summer all the time. So much so that I'm pretty sure I get on other people's nerves.  But, simply put, it makes me happy.  It makes me want to celebrate life.  When I'm happy, I can't help but talk about it and I can't help but want to celebrate!

Did I miss anything on the list?

xo~Elizabeth

On the wall of Da Vida Restaurant - Anguilla Summer 2011